Bulletin Boards and the Liberty League Crown

One of the stock “insights” that comes from College Football pundits during bowl season is that the number one team in the country will grow soft and complacent from the media’s onslaught of praise and predictions during the month-long layover between conference championships and the national championship. Meanwhile, the underdog seethes for being slighted, planning the moment they silence the doubters. They have everything to prove and nothing to lose.

Many coaches at all levels of pro sports tell their players to ignore the news media and all the outside views about the team. As simple as this seems, it is not realistic because for one- the internet and Sportscenter are inevitably absorbed, and two-most people care about how they are perceived and thus like to be in the news.

Our team deals with similar issues but news about us is on a much smaller scale. As far as media, we all follow two blogs about Division III tennis maintained by anonymous hosts- apparently one blogger is from California and the other is from the Atlantic South. (D3TENNIS and TENNISd3) We also use an encyclopedia named Ben Guzick who knows every result and can list the entire roster of any top 20 or ranked Central team. Yes, that includes the biographical information and a scouting report of each player. Now, whenever we quiz him, we give him obscure teams in regions he is unfamiliar with and he hopes to get the answers wrong because he considers his knowledge “an affliction.”

I will cold call him right now as a test:

Me: Hey BG, two questions. Occidental 3.
BG: I don’t know, sorry.
[Ouch 0-1]
Me: Brandeis 5.
BG: That’s easy, Rozenshteyn, even Mike knew that.
[Well excuse me.]
Me: Colby 5.
BG: Matt Mantikas.
[Correct. 2-3]Me: From?
BG: Oh sorry, not sure. Is this for a blog or something?
Me: Maybe. Willamette 2.
BG: I always get them confused with Linfield… hmmm… Kyle Anderson.
[Anderson is the Linfield no. 2. Almost. 2-4.]

The point is that players are going to read the news and seek out news about themselves because they want to be in the know. While coaches can’t stop this news consumption, they can manage it with use of a bulletin board that showcases articles criticizing the team. Even the coach of a heavily favored team can manage the bulletin board material to instill the hunger of an underdog in his favored squad.

Before the season, team captain Mike Mattelson distributed a season preview about Skidmore from D3TENNIS with several lines highlighted:

“They will almost certainly win their conference giving them an NCAA berth but I think they are a few years away from being a threat to a top seed in their region. I would expect a similar year to last year for Skidmore.”

“They should win the Liberty League title easily.”

Skidmore finished third in the Liberty League and Vassar goose-egged St. Lawrence to capture the Liberty League Crown. Celebrating with a sparkling apple cider fight (but forgetting to spray coach) or pretending the plaque is Lord Stanley’s Cup and finding everyday uses for it is almost as satisfying as proving the doubters wrong.

This material came out after our loss to Williams:

“They were one of the hottest teams in the country a month ago but their flaws became apparent when they started facing stronger competition… They just don't have the depth of the other top Northeast teams and if they can't get ahead in doubles it will be very tough for them to stay competitive with top 20 teams.” - D3 TENNIS

“Vassar will obviously make the tournament with ease but due to geographic proximity, I think it is very possible they will end up playing a regional at Middlebury. A sweet 16 appearance isn't out of the question for Vassar, but they don't have the team to go any further.” - D3 TENNIS

In preparation for Amherst and nationals, this is going on the bulletin board.

An Analysis of the Secrets and Considerations of Spelt

When planting spelt, there are several concerns. One, are the hessian flies going to destroy it? Is the lack of fencing going to facilitate unnecessary and unadvertised losses to negligence? Is the non-manipulation of genetic material, as amassed through years of hybridized breeding and sequential drilling with International Harvester machinery, setting the grower back? There are countless others. In fact there are so many that only a determined masochist would attempt a germination test. Fact is, spelt is out of date, underappreciated, unappreciated, and non-appreciated. The hessian fly (originally of Hestia, but immigrated to this country with foreigners of foreign descent) poses a grave threat to the health of the crop. After sowing (ideally at a uniform rate of two and 6 thousandths of an inch) in a sandy loamy clay soil of sufficiently organic matter, the crop should be sprayed excessively with pesticides, herbicides, and insecticides to insure as little biodiversity as possible. In fact I would recommend making major capital donations to monsanto and dow agro-science, etc. to help fund the development of roundup ready seed. As that hasn't yet been developed, we digress at the mercy of the pests. Besides hessian fly, there is the German weevle, the California beetle, the scourge of St. Louis, and the black butterfly that all are potential destructors. Due to the historical lack of genetic manipulation, spelt has not been imporoved by natural selection and hybridization. In fact, it remains on of the most primitive grains still grown by man. Nevertheless, there is a determined and dedicated group of followers that would plant nothing else. Thus we are at the mercy of the vagaries of the crop.


At harvest time, the crop must be collected at night and as quickly as possible. Spelt, unlike wheat, will spook and shatter its grain if it is harvested in the daytime. The spelt plant is one who does not like to give up her secrets. Stealth at harvest is key, otherwise the surrounding spelt will do little more than reseed the ground (at which point it will be very difficult to collect of the ground). These are the concerns. The rewards are few, the work difficult, the cost high. But for a man of determination, gluten free bread is the only bread.

The End of Spring Break

One week removed from an blissful two-week Spring break, I’ve had some time to reflect and gather my thoughts, which is important in maintaining the quality of my posts as I do not want to churn out blogs just because I’ve come under pressure from various interested parties.


This has been a newsworthy month for Vassar men’s tennis but I decided to spare my audience from an aggrandizing blog about sweeping our rival Skidmore or about earning the program’s first ITA national ranking. I could have framed an entry with a revenge theme during Spring break as we knocked off Coe 8-1 and captured a program-first win against TCNJ 5-4. We’re 9-0 on the year and coming off a 3-0 Spring break trip so the undefeated frame was appealing but I’m tired of hearing about undefeated teams considering themselves the underdog and taking it one game, match, or week at a time.


Since I will not use any of the aforementioned frames, I’ll give the highlights of the break in a slightly different way.

The Magic Number is TWO:

After losing to Coe 5-4 in the previous TWO meetings, Vassar won 8-1.

Rochester’s Brian Bowman defeated Mike Mattelson in their TWO meetings Mike’s sophomore year, but Mike grinded out a three-set win to complete the sweep for the Brewers.

TWO tennis matches were canceled because of rain so the team went to TWO movies. I dashed out of The Crazies so I ended up seeing three movies, none worth mentioning.

I visited my friend’s farm on Long Island and assisted in the slaughter of TWO veal calves.

I shadowed at the NFL Player Development office in Manhattan for TWO days. Even though I was disappointed that there was no office linebacker, I met some amazing people and had a heck of a time.


Spring Break Most Likely Awards:

Greg - Most likely to dive head first into a hedge after being booted off of the show “Cash Cab.”
Josh - Most likely to bowl his second ball just before the pins are reset.
Ben - Most likely to fall into an alligator enclosure.
Max - Most likely to dig up tapes for a tabloid or drive a yellow car.
Andrew - Most likely to swallow a bottle of seltzer water.
Mike - Most likely to play high stakes mini golf.
Jeremy - Least likely to ever play tennis on an indoor court again.
Shane - Most likely to start a DIII tennis blog.

Brewers Open Spring Vs. Manhattanville

The Vassar men's tennis team kicks off the Spring season Saturday, February 12 at home in Walker Fieldhouse against Manhattanville.

For the inside scoop on the Brew Crew, check out my season preview.

Also take a look at the revamped player bios, the best in D3.

Here's the soon to be wallpaper graphic I made to represent the upcoming season: